Riding the hospice roller coaster is really scary! You’d better be prepared to hang on tight, ‘cause it’s not for sissies my friends. There are twists and turns and unexpected highs and lows. And just when you think it’s gonna be over, the pace will pick up again. You’ll find yourself flung head first in a whoosh of a downward spiral only to be abruptly climbing within seconds; jerked back as the gears catch for the slow ascent back to the top.

This isn’t my first hospice roller coaster; and I pray it won’t be my last.

Sounds pretty morbid to some, I admit. But in truth, while I’m just about scared out of my wits, it has to be one of the most privileged things I’ve ever taken part in with the exception to the birth of my own child, Dramamine.
I was graced with the privilege to be present while my Daddy, known in the HFTP as Double R, Garry to others, was bridging the gap from this world to the one beyond. He lived hard. And he died hard. And it was a scary thing to watch. As the oldest child, and the only child of my parents, the responsibilities of carrying out Daddy’s wishes were mine, and mine alone.

This time, it’s different. My 96 year old g-maw, Maydine, is ready to go. Heck! She’s been ready since my g-paw died 21 years ago! And the decline we’ve seen in the last 2 years since Daddy went on has been slow and steady. You just can’t rev the engine for 96 years and expect it to last forever.

Sooner or later, the engine is going to wear out. I just pray mine lasts that long.

For the record…these Hospice Nurses are Saints in the making. I’ll be calling Rome in short order to request canonizations! The love, compassion, grace, tenderness and caring for my g-maw is so far and beyond the call of duty that I am humbled in their presence.

Not to mention the care they have shown our family. As they listen, console, hug, pray with, laugh with and cry with us we are overwhelmed by their presence. And the food! My goodness, every detail has been attended to.

But g-maw isn’t ready let go to just yet.

So we hang on to the Hospice Roller Coaster for dear life!

Not knowing which direction to expect.

Praying for an easy send off to the other side. Grateful that I can be present to wave her off and hoping she can save me a place next to her at Jesus’ feet; because right now, it’s the only place I wanna be.

Prayerfully and Peacefully yours,

Nadine Bodine

Your Very BEST friend in the whole wide world!