It is far too easy to confuse approval with respect. And almost impossible to please All of the people All of the time.

Just because someone approves of your actions does not mean they respect you for them. 

Respect is something that is earned. Over time.

Approval is too often times dolled out in wash tubs full by people who are “like minded.” They approve of you and your actions because they too are seeking your approval for theirs. Doesn’t make them right. 

I know because I spent the first 40 years seeking the approval of others. Then either through hormones or an Ephiphany I just stopped caring. Respect became more important than approval. 

Respect is the by-product of pleasing God and approving yourself. It is a feeling of deep admiration for someone or something elicited by abilities, qualities or achievements. 

I hope when I depart that I am respected and admired more than approved of. The qualities I hold near and dear like loyalty, honesty, commitment and trust are the legacy I hope to elicit from others memories of me. Not approval. 

It’s not that I’m mean. I just truly don’t care about approval. Ambivalence at its finest. 

But I do care about respect. 

And praise. Don’t forget to praise one another. Show and speak gratitude. 

Give respect and praise to those around you for their accomplishments…and forgiveness for their shortcomings. 

Respectfully yours,

Nadine Bodine

Your VERY Best friend in the whole wide world