Nadine on…Solutions

The world is neither black, nor is it white; even though some people out there still try to make it so.

Really, it is mostly grey. And not just here in the trailer park.

As a young professional I had an early growth moment when a manager called me in and said, “Don’t come at me with a problem without offering at least one, if not two solutions. In other words, don’t you dare arm-chair quarterback me without having a solution to the problem.” I was taken aback. She was dead right. I reflected on her words and made a BIG change in my approach to problem solving personally and professionally.

People today just want to cry, piss and moan about problems without ever actually solving them. They live to point fingers in the opposite direction without any self reflection or discourse. In doing so they demonstrate they don’t want a solution…they just want to highlight the problem with a big yellow marker to make sure everyone else ‘sees’ it.

Maybe they like the attention of stirring the pot?

Or maybe, they are so attached to their ‘victim’ mentality that they fear if they actually did step away…they might somehow loose their status?

Neither one of the above lends itself to a solution.

My husband, the Marine, has a solution to every problem… “Lead,” “Follow,” or “Get the Hell out of the way!”

I’m with him!

Sitting and crying in your beer solves nothing. Saying you can’t does nothing. (“Can’t never ate a biscuit!”)

However, working together to make a difference, no matter how small your contribution is the real deal! Find your cause. Make a suggestion or two and really work towards solving the problem. Look for viable solutions. Invent them if you must.

Of course! You will be criticized.

People ‘will’ arm-chair quarter back you.

Don’t listen to them. Let them do what they will. They aren’t problem solvers like you. They are just part of the problem.

Solutionally yours,

Nadine Bodine

Your VERY Best friend in the whole wide world 🌎☮️❤️🚋

The 23rd (Keto) Psalm

The Lord and Clean Eating are my shepherd. But Oh! Do I want! (to eat something bad for me)

Yeah! tho thou leadest me onto paths of deliciousness and savory-ness…I shall not want. My insulated Yeti cup filled lemon water and my Keto friends (with amazing transformational stories & delicious recipes) are with me.

Ya’ll give me recipes to keep me on paths of Keto-ness for Keto’s sake.

Yeah! though I walk through mall food courts I will fear no carbohydrates for thou art with me. Your proteins and healthy fats sustain & satisfy me!

You encourage & educate me to prepare a table before me and my family. You anoint my head with (Extra Virgin Olive Oil, Coconut Oil and Avocado) oils, my water bottle overflows.

Surely your wholesome protein packed goodness and healthy fat choices will follow me all the days of my life and I will dwell in the house of Ketosis forever.

And all God’s people said…

Ketoly yours,

Nadine Bodine

Your VERY Best friend in the whole wide world 🌎☮️❤️🚋

Nadine on…Vacations

Nadine on…Vacations

Stop.

Rock.

& Roll.

Jose’ and Nadine have left the trailer park.

Waking up in an uber hard bed in a foreign country is awesome. I recommend it highly. Especially if you have not done it in a while. The odd bumps and grinds of a foreign city are something to be had!

From the strange bird calls to the sounds of the city going to sleep at night and then waking up again, it is amazing to me just how very different we are.

I once knew a man who boasted that he had not been on a vacation for 20 years! Can you imagine? He couldn’t walk a mile without huffing and puffing, suffered with headaches and insomnia, drank like a fish, smoked like a chimney and was morbidly obese. And he complained all of the time to his co-workers. It was clear to all of us that he was maxed out on stress. So what did we do? We went over his head…to his wife…and suggested she make the man take a vacation. For 2 weeks! This story has a happy ending. He took the two weeks off and spent time with his family enjoying himself so much he scheduled another 2 weeks six months later! And he quit drinking alcohol. Quit smoking. And he and his wife lost weight together. He said after stepping away he realized he needed to take better care of himself.

For Jose’ and me, at least once a year, a Mommy-Daddy get away is very important to maintaining our balance. It makes for better relationships all around, even at work. And if we go away far enough…we get to be off the grid; we are off emergency call-down lists, off email, away from phone calls and text messages. It’s great!

The sights we get to see and the people we encounter remind us that our life is anything but ordinary.

Both beach bums at heart, we have a spectacular beach at home. So why vacation at a beach? Why not?! Can’t get enough beach time!

This trip is a return to a place where life’s pace is even slower that what we are accustomed to at home. At home we call it Island Time. Here, it’s Island Time on steroids. No one is in a hurry.

About anything.

Except the Ferry. The 18-minute Ferry ride is quick-quick and always on time! Don’t miss the boat or you will be left! Not to worry as another one will be by in 30 minutes.

The water here is an amazing beautiful crystal clear tranquil blue. The sands are white. The food is excellent and fresh anywhere you go. And the service is always well above par!

Reservations made well in advance and hotel choices that are accommodating but not fancy make this a very affordable get-a-way spot!

So excuse us if we just roll back the clock for a time and relax. As we gate back on our obligations to smell the salt water, snorkel a bit, take time for a beach massage and drink an adult beverage while reading & lounging under a large umbrella. Jose’ and Nadine have left the trailer park. Just for a bit to recharge our batteries. We will be back with more tales to tell.

Vacationally yours,

Nadine Bodine

Your VERY Best friend in the whole wide world 🌎☮️❤️🚋

A slow crawl…

Rebuilding self-esteem is a really big job. Sometimes it is an uphill climb. Prior to meeting Jose’ and moving here to our little trailer park by the sea, self-esteem rebuilding came at a slow but steady crawl.

It began 14 years ago by losing 210 lbs. in one day. A divorce! Ha!

Shortly after that painful/joyful extrication, a well-meaning friend told me it would take me five years to ‘get over it.’ Laughing I responded that he was already in my rear-view mirror. Little did I know.

Two years later my mother, Mawdine, commented as she held my face in her hands, “She’s back!” Proof that other people had noticed my going away and my coming back to myself.

Yesterday, a recently divorced dear friend from school called me to ask me how long it was that I was clearing out and cleaning up the stuff he left behind. Up to that point I had not given it too much thought. Supposing that it had all been cleared out long ago. But it had not; because I still find things from time to time that take me back to one of my past lives.

We have had many lives, as one other sweet friend recently reminded me.

Many lives that have given way to another. Much like the calving of a glacier. That sloughing off of the old to reveal new, fresh, yet raw surfaces.

I’ll bet you have had many lives too.

With each new life comes a hope and a promise for some personal growth. Believe me, there have been times that I had no idea there was so much personal growth possible! With that growth there is always a pairing of getting back to the center of me. Parts of the old me come shining through. The best parts, I think.

We call them ‘seasons’ now; ‘We’ meaning friends my age. Thank you Erik Erickson.

The slow crawl back to oneself does not have to be uphill or without hope. The point being…just keep moving. Don’t look back.

Whether you are moving forward in a positive direction or moving towards center, recognize it is a process. A journey. Your journey. It won’t look the same as mine does; although, sometimes paths converge.

As you travel back to yourself, don’t forget to look out the window and see some sights along the way. Ok?

Crawlingly yours,

Nadine Bodine

Your VERY Best friend in the whole wide world 🌎☮️❤️🚋

Nadine’s Free Advice Friday ~ 08/03/18

Here is this week’s Free Advice ~ Trailer Park Divorce 101

So you have done all you can to make it work? You have invested financially, emotionally, politically, spiritually and physically in this marriage for at least six weeks!!! Or possibly longer?…but sadly none of that is working? And now you have arrived at Hall Sex. The beginning of the end of the relationship.

Hall Sex? The final sex in the marital sex trifecta. It follows Bedroom Sex also called Happily Married Sex that followed Anywhere Sex. Anywhere Sex also known as Honeymoon Sex is that amazing anywhere, anytime sex you had BC (Before Children).

Once children and busy careers were in the mix, there was Bedroom/Happily Married Sex; that was the sex you had ‘when’ and ‘if’ you could in the bedroom behind a locked door, or when you were on vacation without the children. Married people are lucky to have Vacation Sex!

However life happens. And for some divorce happens…and that can sadly lead to Hall Sex. Once you are there there is no going back. For many it is time to lawyer up! But wait! Advice is coming forthwith.

First, by definition, Hall Sex is the precursor sex to an impending divorce. It is when you pass each other in the hallway and say ‘F-you’ and your partner replies either with the same expletive or not at all.

Don’t make eye contact!

You’re done.

Now what?

Before you lawyer up consider saving everyone a whole lot of drama and money. Money you could and should be spending on your next trailer park wedding. If you can…

Unless you find yourself married to a Drama King or Queen. If so, cut to the chase, lawyer up and get her done!

If you are one of the lucky ones, NOT married to drama, count yourself fortunate. Sit down alone and write out your demands.

Be reasonable.

Follow the law.

Have your once beloved spouse do the same. Come together in a public place…without the children…like a Denney’s. I recommend Denney’s because you will NEVER go there again once divorced. It will have too much negative divorce JuJu attached to it and you will not want to go there with your new gal or guy. You will want to go to I-Hop or the Waffle House…the atmosphere and food are so much better. Make sure your soon-to-be-ex picks up the check. Once you have arrived at an agreement, papers signed then just slide the check across the table and sweetly say, “Darlin’ this one is on you.” Get your purse and walk out.

Be sure to have them sign those papers there at the table. Don’t let them go have a few beers at Bubba’s Drive-Thru Beer Barn and exotic emporium lest they change their mind and welch on your agreement!

Next! File those papers immediately at the court house and while you are there pick up the papers you will need to file for wage garnishment! Be proactive. Take no prisoners!

Then go to work diligently or sit at your little casa for the next 60 days. This is not party time. Wait patiently and do not make or take any calls from the soon-to-be-ex. Just don’t.

And of course, this Should go without saying, but Do Not…DO NOT have sex with them! Or with anyone else lest you need last week’s advice Trailer Park Birth Control.

Take Care Of Business (TCB)…before you start moving on. Keep your nose clean and stay out of any trouble with the law because I don’t have enough bail money put back and you look awful in orange.

There it is. Trailer Park Divorce 101.

It’s FREE! As in No Charge. Nada. Doesn’t cost you one single thing. As head Queen of the Trailer Park and the Self-Appointed Life Coach to many, this is just another service I provide. A quick reminder last week’s advice was: Trailer Park Birth Control. Do please go read, like and share as you see fit.

Advisingly yours,

Nadine Bodine

Your VERY Best friend in the whole wide world 🌎☮️❤️🚋

I’ve got your Magic Pill…right here.

A few words about Keto lifestyle and our new WOE (Way Of Eating) or How to avoid the inevitable train wreck as best you can.

Years ago a PBS speaker by the name of Covert Bailey proclaimed, “Fat is not the enemy…Sugar is!” He was absolutely right.

These days people our age around the trailer park are dropping like flies! Stroke! Heart attacks! Diabetes II! Cancer!

Yikes! Makes me want to help them if I can. But like that proverbial lightbulb…it doesn’t change unless it wants to change. Ba-dum-path! (insert sound of crashing symbol)

Wonder why you feel like crap all the time? Why your moods swing? Why your hair falls out by the handfuls? Why your skin looks mucky and yucky? Why your clothes no longer fit the way you would like them to?

I’ll tell you. Nothing new here, Virgina. Not rocket science. It’s what you are ingesting into your body. The addiction to sugar, also known as the ‘new heroin’ in the trailer park, is sending people to an early grave. We all bought into a lie 25-30 years ago and it is killing us from the inside out. That whole low-fat idea is bonkers.

What?! Pray tell, what do you think food companies do when they take out the fat to creat low-fat?

They add sugar.

You swallowed the food pyramid. Like me, whole.

As a young nurse, wanting the best for my patients, I memorized and proclaimed the food pyramid from the mountain tops. But not anymore. Why? Because it doesn’t frickin’ work for me. And it doesn’t work for a whole lot of people. We have become a very obese and sick nation.

Want a ‘Magic Pill?’ Well I’ve found one! It started with watching the documentary ‘The Magic Pill.’ And my Lenten promise to give up sugar for good!

It wasn’t easy. “If it was easy, everyone would look like this!,” Cher. But it is easier than you think!

I started with baby steps to eliminate sugar from my diet, my pantry, my refrigerator and my spice rack. And I bought a really cheap but good digital scale. All by myself for the first four months while my sweet Jose’ did whatever he wanted.

In baby steps over the last 6 months I gave up sugar and it’s nasty side effects like obesity …doesn’t take too many pounds for a shorty like me to look like I’ve been eating the whole dang kitchen! Avoiding obesity is not the only benefit…we will also avoid its first cousins, Diabetes II, heart disease and kidney disease.

I knew I could do this if I was so inclined. I’m the poster child for ‘a way’ that has proven successful. And it’s nothing new to medical science.

My joint pain is totally gone. I no longer have to ease out of bed, up from a chair or out the car, stand for a minute to get my bearings and then walk half bent over until I warm up. Since the sugar is gone, I bounce out of bed every morning like a teenager.

I sleep better, no longer have my hair falling out in handfuls and my skin is much improved too. Oh! And did I mention 18 lbs gone for me and a whopping 33 lbs gone for Jose’! Yeah. That.

So keep your sugah, Sugah. We are fine without it!

Me and skinny Jose’ will continue to share our success stories with those who want to hear.

Stay the course. #KetoOn #HealthySelfHealThySelf #WomenOnKeto

Ketoly yours,

Nadine Bodine

Your VERY Best friend in the whole wide world 🌎☮️❤️🚋

Finders Keepers

Finders keepers

The ocean with all of its beauty and wonder regurgitates all kinds of interesting items daily. Some of these items it just no longer has a use for like pretty shells and sea creatures that are sick or injured. Some things it didn’t want in the first place like garbage or a pair of sunglasses.

For beachcombers like me every day is like Christmas!

Never knowing what I might find that would be useful in the Trailer Park my eyes are always peeled to spot a curious or precious find. It would be interesting to know the story behind these lost articles if the sea would tell; but, she is a clever mistress.

As I walk along I spy all sorts of things Mother Nature no longer has a use for…like a baby shark! Yikes!

A perfect shell for my collection jar!

Purple bathing suit bottoms. Now there’s a story behind those for sure. I wish I knew it!

A pair of cheap sunglasses. I do believe there is a song about them. Possibly tied to the purple bathing suit bottoms? Imagine somewhere on the Galveston beach there is a woman missing both?! Yikes!

An adorable little cactus koozie.

A bobber.

And a very nice (worth $99.00) Garmin Vivo! The band is broken but easily replaced. Lucky me right?!

Now, to tie all of those items together…A beautiful woman was walking on the beach searching for seashells. She was top less wearing only her cheap black sunglasses, her purple bikini bottoms and her Garmin. She was drinking a Bud Light with lime as she searched for shells at the waters edge she heard a voice calling from the water. Looking out into the deep blue Gulf of Mexico she saw a bobber attached to an unmanned fishing pole stuck in the sand. She heard a voice calling for help and saw the bobber going deep under the water. Diving in without regard for her own life she went deep under the surface where she encountered the infamous Land Shark! He snatched her arm drawing her close. But she was a clever girl and hit him over the head with her beer bottle stunning him and swimming away. In her wake she left behind her glasses, the perfect seashell, her deep purple swimsuit bottoms, the cute koozie, the bobber, and her Garmin with a broken band.

Now as I walk the beach I am uber careful to avoid any unmanned fishing poles stuck at the waters edge. I also ignore any suspicious calls for help that are associated with a bobber going deep below attached to an unmanned fishing pole stuck in the sand. That Land Shark is going to have to do better than that to catch me!

Cautiously yours,

Nadine Bodine

Your VERY Best friend in the whole wide world 🌎☮️❤️🚋