So…there is this little problem at work. Read Island. Read Mountain I cannot go over, around, through or under. Read impasse. However you read it…it’s a very real thing.

Not my first rodeo.

Considering myself as a master of Conflict Resolution both personally and professionally I am still really stumped this time.

I have prayed about it. Talked with my personal and professional mentors about it. And of course I have talked to Jose’ about it. And I’ve got nothing. Until the epiphany this morning at 0401 a.m.

I blame Keto for this new found insomnia.

Seems I no longer need 9 hours of sleep anymore because my body only wants 6. Tell my brain. Anyway, I digress.

This is not the First time I have encountered a professional situation that can most possibly be best described as an old fashioned personality conflict. And once again, it is not ME who is the one conflicted. Once again I find myself the object of the conflict. And again…still…it is due to a lack of education on the part of others and a fundamental problem I call ‘professional envy.’ And trust me, that monster is green and ugly.

What to do? How about…do what you have done in the past?…if it worked.

Well, so far here is what I have done and the advice I have received:

1- Pray about it. While it may be working…it’s Not really working. Conflict still exists. And in my humble opinion it’s getting worse. But I will keep praying.

2- I tried the ever faithful ‘Kill them with Kindness’. Definitely.Not.Working.

3- Read a book about conflict resolution. Yup! Read Difficult Conversations (Stone/Patton/Herb) AND How to Win Friends and Influence People (Carnegie). Obviously these people know what they are doing. And the advice and information has been helpful…but the conflict still exists.

4- Take a class! Currently enrolled in a district-wide 5 session workshop. Not ‘really’ helping. But I have met and networked with some pretty cool people!

5- Neither has the age old avoidance technique…you live on your Island and I’ll live on mine…isn’t working either.

Because this time my Administration insists on us working together. But we vibrate at very different frequencies. Collaborative assignments just aren’t getting done.

6- Talking with Admin to get wisdom and advice on how to proceed left me with “Let me take it to a higher level and I’ll get back to you.” No resolution or feedback to date.

So now what? Well here is the what.

Daddy always said when faced with a problem you have but 3 solutions. One, stay and do nothing. Two, stay and do something. Three, leave.

So far doing number one did not work. In an attempt to avoid the easiest and quickest route to number three I am going to try number two. Why? Because I LOVE ABSOLUTELY EVERYTHING ELSE ABOUT MY JOB!

My plan for the week is to talk about it. Speak directly to the elephant in the room. Set up Norms and relationship boundaries. Open dysfunctional communications. Even if it’s just a window. Make a plan for weekly communication opportunities. Do the work of repairing the disconnect. Stay optimistic. Share all of my good energy that I can with as many people as I can. That’s the plan.

I’ll let y’all know how it works out.

Conflictingly yours,

Nadine Bodine

Your VERY Best friend in the whole wide world 🌎☮️❤️🚋

Is it just me?

Even before I started teaching…every year, about this time, I start to regroup. I get past the seasonal thought that…OK! School has started back and I should be back in the groove. But, every year, I am not. I go in and out of the groove and it’s always a tad jerky.

By now I am feeling that life should be routine. It ‘should’ feel normal. Flow like a smooth quiet stream on its way to the holidays full of fun, family, friends and fellowship…and then. WHAM! It hits me smack in the face…that quiet, small, smooth flowing stream is picking up steam! It just got wider. It is more like a river at this point. The pace is getting faster! But I don’t want it to get faster. I just wanna coast along. Smoothly. Like a stream. I don’t want a river. I didn’t buy into this river idea. I’d like my stream back please. I think the recruiter lied!

I drag my paddle in the water in an attempt to slow the pace.

Doesn’t work.

About the time I realize that…it’s.not.working…I look up and out ahead in the water. I see a big stick in the water…paddle now. Paddle will ya?! Getting closer I see it’s not a stick, it’s a whole tree! Divert! Avert! Paddle harder, the current is sweeping me, not the other way around.

Best I can do is lean. And paddle.

Hard!

Trying to think fast on my feet. Ok…think smart. Work smart not hard…to ‘steer’ with the paddle. Focus! Just don’t ‘hit’ the tree.

Or worse. Capsize!

Moving towards survival mindset now. What’s best? Jump and risk swimming to the shore? Maybe drown from the undertow? Lose the boat? Hit the tree and risk damaging the boat? I decide to keep paddling like hell? Do whatever I can to miss the tree.

But I’m already paddling as fast and hard as I possibly can. And I am wearing out. I am tired. Weary.

But hey! Look up! There are some other people in the boat with me. Why didn’t I see them before? Where was my focus? Switch focus. Hand them a paddle. Ask for their help. Good idea! 💡

I’m going to be ok. We are going to be ok.

It may be a new season. And there may be hiccups and whole trees in the way. And I can go through this. With a little help I will move on down the river…that will once again become a stream.

Paddling like hell…

Yours,

Nadine Bodine

Your VERY Best friend in the whole wide world 🌎☮️❤️🚋